I has been noted for some years now that I am turning in to my mum, this is not a bad thing as much as a… well.. just a thing.
It started with shoes, I have the same size and width feet as my mum, this is a good thing as she has a shoe obsession and should I need a specific pair of shoes I can always borrow hers. We have similar tastes in music and TV shows, in fact it was my mum who started me on the road to sci-fi geek in the first place. After having The Hellions things really started to speed along on the transformation.
There are certain phrases that I catch myself saying that scream “MUM”.
So, you know you are a mum when you say…
- Don’t make me come up there
- Can you two not just play nice
- Don’t eat chalk, you won’t have room for dinner
- Tidy up (and you say it so many times it would have been done had you just done it yourself)
- Please be quiet for five minutes
- Why have the kids gone quiet
- Just eat
- Why have you drawn on your sister
There are also super powers that go along with the job that I developed
- Shoe finding
- Bag finding
- Magic cleaning spit
- Kisses that heal any broken leg
- Eyes not only in the back of your head but in other rooms
- The ability to hear even the quietest whisper
- Super spy decoder powers that let you understand a three year old with a lisp
OK so I know these things happen to dads too, in fact when I met Crochet Widower he was on the decline to becoming his own dad,
- He owned a sensible roomy car
- He, alarmingly, owned a pair of cream chino’s and a few polo shirts
- He told “dad” jokes
But the real transformation happened TODAY, after a trip out to a castle with The Hellions he uttered the phrase
“you look with your eyes not with your hands”
when The Clone was picking up Geek Girl’s new boat.
So that is it, we are parents, it won’t be long now before we start saying
- You are not going out dressed like that
- Who’s your friend
- You are grounded
- Where have you been
But for now I’ll stay smug that I am turning in to my mum, after all she made me, and I am awesome.